Julian Barnes's Arthur and George is bound to be one of the highest-profile paperbacks of the new year (Matthew, Adam and I in fact backed the wrong horse and spent the evening guzzling free drinks and canapes at his Booker Prize non-winners party a few months back), and will thus no doubt attract more than its fair share of curious browsers. Imagine my joy, therefore, to discover that not only is it being published in a maximum dirt-attracting cream matte cover - hours of fingerprint-removing fun to be had by all! - but it is also being dispatched to shops with a charming Richard and Judy bookclub sticker on it, which you can either leave on for best "Oh fuck, I thought I wanted to read this, maybe I don't" effect, or peel off, potentially adding - if not done with requisite skill - a whole extra level of book-destroying lint-loving sticky roundness on the front.
For readers not au fait with the finer points of bookselling, I would just like to clarify that we do not put those stickers on the books ourselves - what self-respecting bookseller would choose to sully the covers of their precious merchandise with - to choose a particularly egregious example - that hideously garish, orangey-red, guaranteed to clash with everything "Daily Mail Book Club" sticker? And that's only the third worst sticker I've encountered this year. The second worst was the "As recommended by the author of The Time Traveller's Wife" sticker on the front of Ingrid Hill's (in fact excellent-looking) Ursula, Under. "The author of the Time Traveller's Wife"? She has a name you know - Audrey Niffenegger. And as it happens that's not the only book she's written - but I suppose we'll be waiting for a while before we get the "As recommended by the author of The Three Incestuous Sisters" stickers. The worst of all, though, was the consignment of children's books that we, alongside every other independent bookseller in the country, received with "Waterstones Exclusive" emblazoned across the front.
I fundamentally object to books being treated like fruit so you have to have a sticker on the front of everything, as if you don't know an apple when you see one. Publishers: please stop this sticker madness now.


